When the behavior is asking for you

The situation

Two questions were asked on Peerlore on the same day this month. The first asked how to deal with classroom interruptions while working with another student. The second asked what to do about attention-seeking behavior when the attention being sought is negative. I read both from the supervising side, and I read them as questions about attention, because the library's answer to the second is often the answer to the first.

This issue is written from two real questions asked on Peerlore. Questions asked there are private by default, so I describe them rather than quote them. Nothing identifying came with them.

The answer

Start with the second question. The function-based thinking brief takes "He just wants attention" at its word: "Yes, and? Attention is a function. The intervention is to make attention reliably available for desired behavior, not to withhold attention as punishment." When a student has learned that a reprimand is the surest way to make an adult turn around, the reprimand is what keeps the behavior going; the attention-maintained behavior brief says that negative attention "can be just as reinforcing if it is the student's primary way of accessing social connection." If that is what is happening, the student is getting connection more reliably this way than through the ordinary channels.

The usual advice is to ignore it, and the brief's warning is this: "Ignoring a behavior is only half the plan." On its own, ignoring often fails. The behavior often gets worse before it gets better, and an adult who stops ignoring at that point has taught the student that escalating is what gets the reaction; and much of what passes for ignoring still gives attention, since a sigh, a glance, and a whisper to a colleague all count. The other half of the plan is to make appropriate behavior the fastest route to you. Respond at once and warmly when the student gets your attention the right way, say specifically what you saw, and check in at set times, before anything goes wrong; a student who knows you are coming at the next five-minute mark has less reason to make you come now.

That may also be the answer to the first question. The function-based thinking brief notes that "attention behavior often follows adult attention being unavailable," and the first thing to look at is what the interruption gets the student; if it reliably brings you over, attention is the likely reason. If so, the work comes before the interruption. Before you turn to the other student, say privately what you expect while you are gone and when you will be back. Give the student an easier way to reach you than interrupting, a card or a raised hand, since the antecedent strategies brief notes that "if the replacement is harder than the problem behavior, the problem behavior wins." Then come back on time, every time, so that waiting works. Who the rest of the room goes to while you are working with one student is the teacher's decision, and you are owed that answer before the interruptions start.

Two boundaries. The first belongs to the team: planned ignoring is a team decision, written down before it starts, with every adult who works with the student briefed, so bring it to the supervising teacher as a question about function and let the team set the plan. The second belongs to every adult, every time. The attention-maintained behavior brief's line is the one to keep: "Anything that touches self-worth, hopelessness, being a burden, or hurting oneself -- 'everyone would be better off without me,' 'I can't do this anymore,' visible self-harm -- gets a response, a direct ask, and a route to the counselor, every time, no matter how often it happens or who it seems aimed at." The brief adds: "The same holds for genuine distress and for behavior that is a student's only way of communicating a need."

As the function-based thinking brief puts it, "Attention is a need; the question is how to meet it." A student who has found an unpleasant way to meet it is telling you the need is real. The job is to give it a better channel, and to be there, reliably, when they use it.

Words you can use this week

1. Before turning to another student: "I'm going to work with the other group for five minutes. Hand up if you need me, and I'll be back in five minutes."
2. Catching it right: "You raised your hand instead of calling out. I noticed that."
3. For the team: "What is this behavior getting them, and what would get it for them faster?"
4. For the team: "Before we start ignoring anything, can we write down what we will ignore and what we will always respond to?"

From the library

• Attention-Maintained Behavior — why ignoring alone makes it worse, and what to pair it with.
• Antecedent Strategies — the moves that happen before the behavior, matched to what the student is after.
• Function-Based Thinking — what a behavior is getting the student, and why that matters more than the behavior.

Have a situation of your own? Ask a question on Peerlore. It is private by default, and the answer comes from the library, immediately.